Choosing a team…

People have been asking me about the available teams in advance of the upcoming league, so I thought I’d give some detail of how they each play. Of course, I’m still learning their styles as much as you are, so don’t take this as gospel. Of course, chatting to the coaches who ran these teams in previous league is another good source of info!

I’m going to detail the teams in 3 groups, each season at a time.

Season 1 The ‘starter’ teams. These teams are the most ‘basic’ in terms of stats and rules. Only one of them has any special rules for a model and most have the same stats across the board.

 Corporation (Humans, ‘male’): These guys are the all rounder team. Simple to play. They have all three roles, and the most basic stats- as everything’s pretty much 4+ (aside from Striker armour of course!). This means that the team can hold its own against hitting teams and running teams, but doesn’t start off specialised as other teams might. What it does mean though is that, if you play them just right, you can use your players experience to specialise the team to best suit your style.

 Forge Fathers:  The short ones. This is a slow team. They have each of the 3 roles but start limited to 2 strikers, who are quite slow. Dashing with them being a huge risk. Moreover, if one of your dwarves falls, getting up on a 5+ speed can be hard. However, they have arguably the best starting guards who hit really hard and have the ‘steady’ ability, meaning they can’t be knocked down (they can still fall though). You still need to play a scoring game to keep up the league table, so don’t try to rely on a killing game, or your inexperienced strikers will be outmatched later in the competition.

 Veer-myn: Rats! Probably the toughest of the season 1 teams to play. This team has strikers and guards. The guards are average, their strength being no better than humans. They’re fast though. The strikers too are as fast as one can get, with speed of 3+. Their downside is a skill of 5+. This makes picking up, throwing, catching tough. Bitter experience has taught me never to use 1st action to try picking up, you’ll fail and lose the ball and your rush. However, cards, extra dice and levelling will help. Try to be making a strike attempt every rush, use speed to avoid dying!

 Marauders: Orx & Goblins. The only team to (technically…) feature 2 species. Orx guards and Goblin jacks. These Orx are tough, probably as good as the Dwarf guards but can be knocked down. The Goblins are average skill, good speed. However they’re jacks, so lack the ability to make strike attempts as often as strikers. Offensive coaches, cards and blue dice can help, but until you get these, try scoring over 2 rushes!

 Season 2:

Robots: An interesting team, probably quite tough to run, but rewarding when you figure out how (and tell me if you do!). They all start as jacks, and can use actions to transform into the other 2 roles. Their stats as guards are good, as is their striker stats. They move further as jacks however. So balancing your mix of roles is crucial, and of course depends on your opponents. Keep in mind, you only start with 6, so there’s nothing there to absorb casualties!

 Corporation (human ‘female’): A variation on the human team, only one guard, of average ability (same as the men), 3 strikers. Their strength lies in their jacks, who each get the ‘run interference’ ability to use once a game. Use these jacks to disrupt opposing play to stop them scoring or slamming, then use your strikers and 4 coaching dice to go for a landslide victory before a faster/harder team outplays you.

 Judwan: Peace, man! This is an odd, anomalous team. They’re all strikers because their ethos forbids violence. They have average speed, cannot score bonus points (so a landslide takes 3 as opposed to the normal min of 2 rushes) and get a special move to replace ‘slams’ whereby they can move opposing players. They’re a good team, but as they are all strikers there is not much variety to how they play, and a coach has very limited options.

 Z’zor: Back to a team with all 3 roles, the bugs have some interesting features. Their one guard is strong and high strength, their strikers are average. Their jacks, however, are the only (basic/starting) ones in the game who can move more than one hex to slam/throw. It’s a risk however as it’s a dash on 4+ speed! If it works though, they’re devastating and came 2nd place last year.  

Season 3:

Teratons: Right, this is an easy one to explain, large, bi-pedal, dino-turtles with a natural teleportation ability. See? The come in 2 flavours- guards and jacks. Their guards are hard and tough, good match for any others. Their jacks are average, again they might need 2 turns to score so keeping possession is key- use the guards to kill opposing strikers because they’ll steal possession from jacks. Also, none of them can ever be slammed from behind as they just teleport out of the way!

 Nameless: This is where the ‘technically’ from marauders comes in- this team is technically 3 species! The large 6 legged ones are their strikers who are average. Their crab looking ones, hard guards, and their cthulhu face ones- sticky guards. The key with this team is to use a sticky guard from behind to debilitate the opponent with ‘sticky’ then slam with the hard guards. Try any other tactic and your team is likely to be picked apart. While they do this you strikers will hopefully be free to score some points.

 Asterians: “Never trust and Elf”- Gimli. Words to live by for the Asterians’ opponents. This team has only one guard, 3 jacks and 4 strikers. Their players are all ‘fragile’ meaning they lose and armour dice. However, the ‘take a dive’ (jack) and ‘dirty tricks’ (guard) ability can clear an opposing team straight to the sin bin, or a sending off while your very fast, high skill strikers blast to a landslide!

 Zees: Just don’t play the monkeys. Seriously, don’t. They’re very very hard to play. I took them last year for fun, and because I really wasn’t in the running for the prize! They are immense fun, but massively frustrating to play. They also have more ‘abstract’ rules than other teams. Really for more advanced coaches. If you do want to run them, come and ask me about them.


Indeed find me, or any other of our star coaches for more info, or to learn about skills etc. Our lovely committee will also be happy to get DB for you for a game or just to look through the rules!

Somewhere named Sligo


It’s the palm trees that get you.

There are some things you expect to see in Ireland: rolling green hills, fields of sheep, rainbows with leprechauns at the end pouring pints of Guinness. But not palm trees.

And yet, in a little pocket of the northwest known as Sligo, you’ll find them. You’ll also find other things that seem out-of-place for the Emerald Isle, like a Kiwi surf instructor who came up from down under because the waves are just better in Ireland. And ancient sea fossils embedded in the sand, seemingly so many of them that you can barely put a foot down without landing on a piece of marine life that’s millions of years old. And stand-up paddleboard lessons, and chefs dedicated to organic foods, and musicians jamming in pubs and on the streets as evening falls (okay, that last one is totally what you expect to…

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Round 5 beckons

Okay folks, this is the penultimate week, I’ll try and keep this brief, here’s the table so far, on the right you can see your cash in hand and underdog if any.


  Team Type Coach Played W L D Pts Strike Diff Ranking Cash on hand Underdog
1 A Bugs Life Z’zor James Gandolfi 4 3 0 1 8 12 176 23  
2 Youre Lyan Asterians Sean Gilmore 4 2 0 2 8 14 169 8 4
3 Belfield Blizkregis Corporation 1 Ray Kennedy 4 3 0 1 8 12 143 12 21
4 Killer Hippos Judwan Cormac Benn 4 3 1 0 8 8 162 14  
5 Monkey Zee Monkey Do Zees David Kenny 4 2 1 1 7 7 164 21  
6 The Abusement Park Forge Fathers Simon Reeve 4 1 3 0 5 -5 173 1  
7 The Plastics Orx & Goblins Tadhg Hasset 4 2 2 0 5 0 169 2 7
8 Warfarin Wanderers Veer-myn Isaac Montague 4 2 1 1 5 -1 120 17 34
9 Sticky Steelers Nameless Philip Cullen 4 1 2 1 4 -10 154 22  
10 The Koopa Troopas Teratons Ronan Tynan 4 1 3 0 4 -8 131 6 11
11 The Turing Testers Robots Peter Hanrahan 4 0 4 0 3 -17 142 3  
12 The Beards Corporation 2 Daire Rooney 4 1 3 0 3 -10 131 16 31

Here’s the list of MVPs, send in your bids ASAP please, don’t bid for people not available this week as you’re wasting time and credits! NB!!!! Because we’ve switched to blind bidding, coaches no longer have automatic bids for last weeks MVP, if someone out bids, you lose the MVP you had last week!

MVP Start bid Role Plays for
Slippery Joe 7 S Orx & Goblins
Buzzcut 9 G Anyone
Wildcard 9 J Human/Asterian
Rico Van Dien 12 S Anyone
Number 88 8 J Anyone
Riller 10 J Anyone
Alpha Simian 20 GIANT J Anyone
Ludwig 10 J Z’zor
Yurik Yurikson 9 G Anyone but Orx
John Doe 8 G Anyone but Orx
Reek Rolat 15 G Veer-myn
Gabe 8 J Anyone

Finally here’s the list of matches

Daire VS Cormac

Peter VS Ronan

Philip VS Isaac

Tadhg VS James

Simon VS Sean

David VS Ray

Any questions let me know! Remember to contact you opponent and arrange a game ASAP, if we can finish by wednesday again this week it would be great!





Round 4- Payback?

Okay folks, the round 4 fixtures are coming in hard and fast! As for the MVP auction this is what we’re doing.

The auction is going to be via blind bidding. As soon as your fixture is announced, along with the cash you have you can bid. You can use cash in hand or underdog bonus. The way it will work:

Each coach can make up to 5 bids. These can be for the same, or for different players. They can also be for varying amounts. Of course, you need to actually have the cash to bid with, and you can’t bid more than you have.

Bids should be emailed to me, with the subject line BID. Send the emails to

Include your name, the 5 bids- who they are for and how much the bid is.

I won’t open them until all bids are in, and I’ll send Tadhg a mail with my bids so that mine will be above board.

Once all are in, MVPs will go to the highest bidder.

First, I’ll be contacting the coaches who had MVPs last round as they will have 1st pick to retain MVPs, if they so wish and one of their bids will be used on that.


Here’s the list of MVPs

MVP Start bid Role Plays for
Mellisandra 10mc J Anyone
Reek Rolat 9 G Veer-myn
DBR7-Firewall 10mc K Anyone
Riller 10 J Anyone
Dozer 19 GIANT G Anyone
John Doe 8 G Anyone but Orx
The Praetorian 11mc S Anyone
Rico Van Dien 12 S Anyone
Buzzcut 11 G Anyone
Barricade 18 GIANT G Anyone
Anne-Marie   Helder 9mc G/S* Anyone
Yurik Yurikson 11mc G Anyone but Orx
Mee-kel Judwan 12mc S Judwan

I’ll post follow ups in the comments section below!

Round 3: Upsets!

Hey there sports fans! A. Nrd back again with the latest news- brought to you this week by the worst table quiz in history (and I’ve been to Masonic quizes).

So round 3 is over, and the atomised blood is settled to the floor. A lot has happened to the table. Monkey Zee Monkey do spent most of the week at the top after a cunning last ditch 2 point win against You’re Lyan, the Asterian’s couldn’t do it, despite their flirting with poor sportsmanship. They even had their star puncher, AM Helder sent off early game for stomping!

The elated monkeys were certain of going into the post round at the top at the end of the ShellShock game, as the Koopa Troopas Stormed to a landslide victory over the stunned Coach Hassett & The Plastics. Special mention to Dolly, the brave Orx guard murdered by a launching ball, or the Turtle who pushed her in front of it- depending on which coach you ask.

So that cemented the top two spots for the Monkeys & The Blitz. That was until Gandolfi and his Bugs Life took the second landslide of the day, sending the Beards packing their trunks right back to the e-circus. The Z’zor now sit top of the table on team ranking, though the top 3 teams share the same points. Once cash on hand is spent and the rankings change thing might look different again. So here’s the table!

Team Type Coach Played W L D Pts Strike Diff Ranking
1 A Bugs Life Z’zor James Gandolfi 3 2 0 1 6 8 163
2 Monkey Zee Monkey Do Zees David Kenny 3 2 0 1 6 9 153
3 Belfield Blizkregis Corporation 1 Ray Kennedy 3 2 0 1 6 9 127
4 The Plastics Orx & Goblins Tadhg Hasset 3 2 1 0 5 6 163
5 Youre Lyan Asterians Sean Gilmore 3 1 0 2 5 5 152
6 Killer Hippos Judwan Cormac Benn 3 2 1 0 5 1 139
7 The Koopa Troopas Teratons Ronan Tynan 3 1 2 0 4 -1 132
8 The Abusement Park Forge Fathers Simon Reeve 3 1 2 0 4 -2 154
9 Warfarin Wanderers Veer-myn Isaac Montague 3 1 1 1 3 -4 126
10 Sticky Steelers Nameless Philip Cullen 3 0 2 1 2 -10 132
11 The Turing Testers Robots Peter Hanrahan 3 0 3 0 2 -14 126
12 The Beards Corporation 2 Daire Rooney 3 1 2 0 2 -6 127

Stay tuned for the fixtures for round 4, it’s getting near the end now….!

Fixtures, MVPs, rules.

Attention Coaches! Just some housekeeping before the next round starts!

The following is thee result of the MVP auction last night:

MVP Start bid Role Plays for Bought by Final Cost
The Praetorian 11mc S Anyone David 11mc
The Enforcer 10mc G Anyone Ray 12mc
Reek Rolat 9mc G Veer-myn Not Sold *
Mee-kel Judwan 12mc S Anyone Not Sold *
Mellisandra 10mc J Anyone Sean 10mc
Wildcard 9mc J Human/Asterian Sean 9mc
Ludwig 10mc J Z’Zor   *
Rico van Dien 12mc S Anyone Simon 12mc
Wyn Grethski 11mc S Robots Not Sold *
Gabe 8mc J Anyone Philip 8mc
Nightshade 8mc S All (except Asterian) Daire  9mc
Firewall 10mc K Anyone Peter 13mc
Alpha Simian 20mc Giant J Anyone Ronan 20mc
Number 88 8mc J Anyone David 10mc
Anne-Marie   Helder 9mc S/G Anyone Sean 9mc
Dozer 19mc Giant G Anyone Ronan 19mc


That’s the last time we will run the MVP auction like that, as it’s too difficult to get you all together at once (for which you should be ashamed!). From the end of round 3, we shall operate a blind bid system. This will allow each coach to make 4 bids (in secret- via email). The bids can each be for the same MVP, different ones, or a mix. Normal rules apply, you can’t bid with cash you don’t have etc. Once all bids are in I’ll compare them and announce who has won the MVP for the round. This means everyone will have from Friday (or earlier) through to Sunday to make their bids- results will be announced Sunday nights.

Secondly, some rules updates I have to introduce following observations this week:

  • Game Length: League games are now limited to 1 hour in duration. Some coaches are taking far too long to play their rushes, it is not fair to your opponent, to the rest of the league, and is very much not how the game is played. If you’re opponent is taking to long don’t be afraid to hurry them up as they’re costing you!
  • Organising fixtures: You really need to start organising your games better, and organising your friendlies. The fixtures are announced days in advance, and there’s the whole weekend to message your opponent and arrange a time to play. If coaches need to play after 5 in the evenings, the game will be at board games and war games nights- other than this you must check with committee running any other events to see if they’ll be able to store the game in the office when you’re finished. The Committee are being very obliging in this regard so let’s not take advantage and try getting our games done earlier. No Starting matches at 5 if you haven’t arranged somewhere to put the game!
  • Friendlies: We’re still not getting friendlies played, so I have to formalise the process for playing them. 1) Can’t play a friendly against your league opponent for the round. 2) Can’t play a friendly against a team you played in a friendly last round. 3) Friendlies need to be recorded for home/away and to keep track of who has played. 4) If an MVP dies in a friendly you will not have him for a league match. 5) No team can play a second friendly until all teams have played one.
  • Communication and availability: It’s been hard for some of you to get games in- if you feel you can’t commit the time to 1 or 2 games a week, let us know now and we can replace you. Last week’s round could have ended Wednesday but we were waiting for just 2 coaches who were holding 10 other people up!
  • Game set-up and Layout. This is an important one folks: I have noticed some dodgy dice rolling and card dealing and it’s not good enough. This might be a fun game but remember we’re playing a tournament for prizes so lets keep it fair and above board: Players need to keep all dice, cards and action tokens on one side of the board. As action are spent, move them to the opposite side so you and your opponent can see. DO NOT move a player without first spending the action token or card. Dice should all be kept on one side and rolled on the other. If you’re not rolling a dice it cannot be in the field you’re rolling into. I’m going to start going mental at people doing this, really mental. cards should be left on the table, and care should be taken drawing cards- the deck should be on one side of the table, perpendicular to the edge of the board- the discard pile on one side, the event on the other. Cards should be kept orientated the right way- it’s getting very annoying having to sort out the deck before every game because people don’t care to keep things in order!

Any questions let me know, if there’s anything else I’ll let you’s all know!

David out.

Round 3 beckons!

Good afternoon sports fans, the dust of round 2 has settled and the results are in! As important as they may be, we here at GS Sports News feel that the exciting fixtures for round 3 are even more important!

And here they are-

Round: 3        
Round Player UD   Player UD
Match 1 Ronan 52mc VS Tadhg *
Match 2 Philip 2mc VS Isaac *
Match 3 Peter 11mc VS Cormac *
Match 4 Daire 21mc VS James *
Match 5 Simon 13mc VS Ray *
Match 6 Sean 35mc VS David *

The MVP auction will be taking place asap, and matches can begin on Monday! The following MVPs are going to be available, being auctioned in a random order. If an MVP was killed in the last round, the coach who let them die cannot hire them in this round!

MVP Start bid Role Plays for
Reek Rolat 9mc G Veer-myn
Rico van Dien 12mc S Anyone
The Praetorian 11mc S Anyone
Mellisandra 10mc J Anyone
Nightshade 8mc S All (except Asterian)
Mee-kel Judwan 12mc S Anyone
Ludwig 10mc J Z’Zor
The Enforcer 10mc G Anyone
Number 88 8mc J Anyone
Wyn Grethski 11mc S Robots
Firewall 10mc K Anyone
Anne-Marie   Helder 9mc S/G Anyone
Wildcard 9mc J Human/Asterian
Gabe 8mc J Anyone
Alpha Simian 20mc Giant J Anyone
Dozer 19mc Giant G Anyone